Tuesday, October 6, 2020



Things do not work because of the personalities involved but because of the principles applied. You must respect the institution of marriage; otherwise it will not work for you.

Marriage is the first and the oldest institution in the world. It is not an association founded by men. It is an institution that God is committed to and until you are committed to it, He will not be committed to making it work for you.

What is marriage? Marriage is the coming together of a man and woman for harmonious living. It is a covenant relationship between two people of opposite sex, both of them seeking to give and receive satisfaction for their healthy needs and desires. It is a process of adjustment, agreement, appreciation and total commitment to one another for better living.

Marriage can be likened to a school where you begin to acclimatize yourself to a new environment and receive a completely new orientation to life. In this institution, they are basic rules you must know and follow.

In the marriage institution, couples will undergo examinations from time to time. The best way couples can pass such exams is to live ready for any challenge that might come up at any time. They must embrace sincerity as a rule of the game.

Marriage is for life, once a couple is married, they must remain committed to the covenant and observe all the guiding rules of marriage.

Unless you live for a cause you remain under a curse. And whatever you live for, you give your life completely to it. Marriage is a good cause and it is worth living for.

No matter the bad experiences of people in the world today, Marriage is good. It was designed to make life great and complete.

Marriage is a process of Adjustment. Adjustment means making little changes in order to correct or improve your relationship, especially in behavioral pattern and your way of thinking.

Marriage thrives on agreement. For marriage to work, agreement must be in place, not argument. Two people cannot walk or live together except they agree (Amos 3:3).

No one person knows it all, so create an atmosphere for productive dialogue rather than remaining silent with so many issues bottled up within.

Silence kills relationship; it never helps situations especially when there is anger, bitterness and strife. Even God says "come let us reason together, produce your strong cause, let us plead together". That is the principle you must adopt to encourage agreement in the home.

Dialogue must never be allowed to turn into arguments. An argument only confirms people in their own opinions and has never brought solution. The best way to put an end to arguments and have agreement is to always turn to the word of God for guidance.

Avoid asking foolish and unnecessary questions that keep degenerating into arguments which lead to serious strife in the home.

Talk issues over with each other. Stop keeping to yourself. It is a good thing to be in agreement because the Bible says when you dwell together in unity; you begin to command blessings that you don't even deserve (Psalm 133).

Marriage is all about appreciation. A man of appreciation never lacks attention. Nothing provokes a man to better performance than appreciation.

Your value determines the level of respect that you have for one another. The person you don't appreciate tends to depreciate; he or she will lack inspiration and aspiration for new things. You must learn to appreciate your spouse. It is God's nature to always appreciate, that was why after He created the first man and woman, He looked at them and blessed them. That is appreciation.

Lay it to heart to always appreciate your spouse. Compliment your spouse instead of comparing him/her with others. Remember, comparison is the game of fools while appreciation gives no room to a complaining spirit.

Source: Codes For Blissful Marriage (Chapter 1)
Copyright © 2007 by Mary A. Abioye

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